Not Fair!

I may have said this before, but I really don't get the point of suffering. Forget any biblical or philosophical reason. Why should good people suffer?! Two very lovely, very wonderful people in my life are having a very bad day. It's not fair to them and I would give anything if I could fix their hurt for them. Instead, all I can do is sit here, cry for them and feel helpless. What do you say to someone who has had the rug pulled out from under them so many times that no matter what you say you'll sound trite?

Moving Forward!

Mr. Awesome is away for the weekend at a Men's Sensitivity Weekend (he hates that I call it that) where he and his closest friends drink lots of beer, eat lots of red meat and talk lots of sports. They're all about being MEN this weekend and not the under-appreciated workmen they're reduced to the rest of the year. Mr. Awesome deserves a break because he works hard to support all of us and does more than his share of the work here at home. I'm glad he's getting a chance to be with friends and recharge.

So, of course, Toser is being extra whiny and talkative tonight and I think my brain may be oozing out of my ears. I'm not proud that I've resorted to turning on the TV so he will just shut up already. I know. I've already said it all to myself but it's worth the guilt because my head is seriously going to explode any minute. BUT I love that kid more than anything because he just turned to me and said, "I love you Mommy." How does he know I was this close? He's still going to Coco and Papa's to spend the night tomorrow. In his defense, he's having a rough week. The paci fairy came and he hasn't been so crazy about bedtime. Yes. He still slept with a pacifier up until a few nights ago. We justified it this long because it was only at bedtime but it was time to cut it loose. And yes, we resorted to introducing a mythical creature that came while he was asleep and left a balloon that we tied the paci to and let go into the wild blue yonder. We meant to get rid of it after last Christmas but Tater was in and out of the hospital and then in for 3 months so getting rid of the pacifier just wasn't high on the list of priorities around here. Of course when I started telling him last weekend that the paci fairy was coming, I wasn't thinking about Mr. Awesome being gone this weekend. I'm all about the bad timing. Tonight should be FUN. Lord help me. But poor Toser. He's been really torn up about it, as seen in the video.


Tater got a new gait trainer today! It's purple and we're calling it the sports car. His other one is so old I can't find a picture of it on the internet. He loves his sports car. Today in therapy he actually moved his legs enough to move the gait trainer forward. Before, when we put him in the old one, he would hold his legs up and cry. It's very neat to see him being mobile standing up. He looks so tall! Tonight I put him in it in front of the TV and he just stood there, which is good therapy because he was bearing weight on his legs which he just doesn't do. He's still got a little work in the form department but yay!! Here's a video of him moving today in therapy (sorry about the shaking-I was laughing):


And I joined the Y and am getting in shape. I need me some muscles in order to haul Tater and his gear around. I'm enjoying fitting into some old jeans and feel better about myself than I have in a long time. I love the moving forward we've all done lately. Makes me feel all productive or something.

No Naps for You

Tater is loving the scooting. His therapists aren't so crazy about it because as far as developmental milestones go, scooting isn't really one of them. They're extremely happy he is moving but scooting doesn't develop any other skills (other than we can treat nasty rug burn and knock it out in a day-shouldn't that count?). Right now, he's scooting back and forth between a toy and the front door. He will sit at the front door and wave at people who are walking by. We and the neighbors think it's pretty much the cutest thing.

Toser is not loving life right now. We got really lax about bedtimes this summer and it had gotten out of hand (um, 10:00pm?!) so we're doing bedtime boot camp this week. No naps means he's actually tired at a decent hour but means the afternoons have been hell for everyone. I hope after this week we can start naps again and still get to bed on time. He was upstairs just now and was too quiet so I went to check. He was in bed, lights out, asleep. My poor child is having to sneak naps. Meanwhile, I'm sneaking wine.

CC and LJ came over today so CC could learn Tater's care and vent settings (it helps that she's a RN with many degrees and is very quick in the picking up of medical things). She insists someone else should know, just in case. Isn't she smart and pretty? And I got to hold LJ so I get 2 bonuses out of the teaching.

We're all good here. Tater's off oxygen this week but that could change. Mr. Awesome's work has calmed down and he isn't so preoccupied all the time. I had a breakdown yesterday about something very inconsequential but a good dinner with great friends was what I needed. I laughed so hard (KWu, you're hilarious) and was refreshed today. Everything seems to be even keel this week other than the naps. I hope it lasts!